What if you were able to uncover - beneath every quarrel - an unmet desire, an unmet desire that fuels and drives the quarrel?
James talks about this in his letter to Christians scattered all over the world. And we talked about it in our Grow Group tonight.
What causes quarrels and fights?
The desire to be respected and to have that respect expressed in a certain way
The desire to be heard and understood
The desire to be appreciated for being transparent
The desire to have things go according to plan
The desire to see things through to the end
There's nothing wrong with these desires. They're good. Even healthy. Except when they serve as fuel for quarrels and fights, when they fuel our selfishness, when they serve as substitutes for God.
Pick a fight. Examine it. What's behind it?