Shame, fear, the false self and a Retreat Day

As part of my annual review for my work with the church last year, I was asked to take a monthly retreat day. I find this difficult to schedule, but wonderful when I do.

Today is my last working day of the month. I had the retreat day scheduled earlier in the month and bumped it, then bumped it again. There's never a convenient time to go off and reflect and read and pray.

Photo by Jeremy Cowart
During my reflection time, I wrote a little poem to capture some of the concepts I'm working through today. I thought it might be interesting to share:

Shame has leaped over the fence
She tramples the garden of my soul
Gunfire will scare her away
But my hands are empty 
Fear gives up on the garden
What good's a soul anyways?
Big block walls rise around the fence
Can we settle for safety? 
The false self paints the walls
"We meant to do this"
We pretend
How will I live, cut off from my soul?
The nudge to reflect on shame, fear and the false self came from Rob Liddell, a friend from my high school days, who recommended the book Scary Close by Donald Miller. Great stuff!


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